After the Applause: The Work No One Sees
I said the word "so" 83 times in my last speaking event.
And yes, there was a standing ovation.
There were pictures, hugs, kind words, and people telling me about other speaking opportunities.
But when the lights go down and you are on the plane, train, or in the car heading home, that is when the real work begins.
The first thing I do is listen to myself.
And let me tell you, that is one of the hardest parts.
There is a real reason people do not like hearing their recorded voice. When we speak, we hear ourselves one way in our own head, but a recording lets us hear what everyone else hears. That difference can be jarring.
But I listen anyway.
Then I transcribe the entire talk.
I compare what I actually said to what I thought I said.
I look for the words I overused.
The stories that landed.
The lines that need more space.
The moments I rushed.
The places where I gave the audience time to feel something, and the places where I moved too fast.
This is part of my process.
I write my talk on colored note cards.
Green is for the pieces I can use another time.
Purple is for the lines I want to land in the room and live in someone's memory or someone’s heart
I like so many speakers are a work in progress. I thank those that have supported me, I thank those that I have I mentored me. I thank those at HEROIC Public Speaking for showing me how seriously to take this craft.
I learned to hone my craft.
It is where I found my voice, and the clarity around the message I believe I am here to share.
For me, that message is The Negotiator's Mindset.
Not negotiation as a tactic.
Not negotiation as a hard conversation you only have when money is on the table.
But negotiation as the way we prepare our thinking before we ask, advocate, set boundaries, claim value, and decide what we deserve.
That is the message I believe can change rooms.
Careers, organizaitons and change lives.
The pre-work and post-work are the parts people rarely see.
The timing, structure, emotional journey. and the
rehearsal and I can’t forget t
he debrief with the meeting planner. All of those things are important, but one of the most important things is the debrief with myself.
Most people only see the 30 to 45 minutes on stage. They see the applause, the pictures, the polished version, but the real work begins when you are brave enough to watch yourself, hear yourself, and tell yourself the truth.
The stage is where the message is delivered and…
The craft is developed after the applause stops.
